So, it's raining outside. And even though I've been doing such a great job lately of pressing on, moving forward, accepting my situation and not letting the sadness overwhelm me, this stupid rain checkmated me.
As horrible as all the things that have happened lately have been (this situation really is my own personal horror story), somehow in this moment, listening to the rain smack against the pavement outside my lonely little apartment, I miss him. And I'm remembering all of the beautiful moments in our relationship that happened in the rain... and because they're beautiful, because once, our relationship was beautiful, I want to share some of them.
The very first conversation we ever had (which happened to be on Facebook) happened during the very first Arizona monsoon that I ever witnessed. When the rain had calmed down, my roommate and I went outside to dance around and play in it, and he told me that was the most adorable thing he'd ever heard of.
At the very beginning of our relationship, when everything was still magical and unbelievable and new, he surprised me at my house with my favorite coffee. During a monsoon.
Once, I showed him my bucket list, and on it was "kiss in the rain." (Cheesy, I know). Later that evening, we went to Chipotle for dinner (one of our favorites), and when we came back out, it was raining. And he kissed me.
Those are just a few, but aren't they beautiful memories? I hope that someday, I can remember them with fondness instead of with grief. And I hope that it stops raining soon.